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Are you freaked out by Friday the 13th? Is it bound to bring you an unbridled bout of bad luck? Or, are you just a tad perturbed, thinking all this superstitious stuff is nowt bar nonsense? Well, whatever camp your legions lie in, let’s tackle this freaky Friday business, once and for all.

First of all: Why all the hate for the much maligned Friday the 13th?

Well, there are a lot of conflicting theories on this, but the most prevailing ones, at least in our Western Christian culture are biblically based:

•    According to the Bible, Jesus Christ was one of 13 guests at The Last Supper, was betrayed by guest number 13, and also died on Good Friday.

•    It is also claimed that the 13th was the day that Eve was tempted to take a bite from the apple growing from the Tree of Knowledge.

•    Some numerology buffs believe the number 13 to be unpleasing, as it follows the far-more-pleasing, rounded 12, which is seen as a number of ‘completeness’ ––  Jesus had 12 apostles, legends tells us that there were 12 gods of Olympus, there are 12 hours on the clock, 12 months in a year, even 12 signs of the zodiac (well, unless you count that silly new, 13th addition to the set, called Ophiuchus, and I don’t. As far as I’m concerned, if Mystic Meg ain’t having it in her horoscope, then neither am I. If you believe in Ophiuchus, you are clearly a heathen, and no more shall be said of it). The number 13 is the irregular, uneven follower of class-prefect-perfect 12, kind of the rebellious straggler, and nobody likes a straggler.

•    There’s also a Norse myth which lends itself to giving Friday the 13th a bad rap also  –-  the story goes that there were 12 Norse gods dinner-partying it up big style in Valhalla, the Norse heaven. Obviously not one to miss a gathering, a god going by the name of Loki gate-crashed the bash, and, as all gate-crashers are wont to do, arranged for a fellow god to shoot Balder the Beautiful, the god of joy and goodness. As you can guess, this story didn’t end well, or even moderately well, with random gods passed out on couches of indeterminate comfiness, with random penii drawings decorating their visages. Nope, our man Balder done and died, presumably going to the great Valhalla 2.0 in the sky, whereupon the whole of earth was said to become dark and fittingly, was said to mourn him.

Meanwhile, Balder either:

a)    Never partook of any of the heavenly parties that were going on in the afterlife due to a severe case of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Sausage rolls, the definitive party food of all true sophisticates, were bound to bring him out in a shaky, nervous sweat; and seeing as he was said to have been shot with a mistletoe-tipped arrow, Chrimbo parties and smooching under the mistletoe were totally out of the question.

b)    Or, he decided to party it up like a boss, sticking two fingers to the shifty Loki whenever he caught a glance of the sneaky scoundrel whilst peeking through the heavenly, super-soft clouds down to Valhalla 1.0.

Secondly: Does the superstition hold up – is Friday the 13th actually unlucky?

•    Well, from a psychological perspective it can be perceived as so, due to us silly humans being swayed by a tendency to notice and look for information which supports our theories, however whack they may be. This is called confirmation bias. So, for example, if you believe that Friday the 13th is the harbinger of bad luck, you’re more likely to sit up and take notice when you spill your steaming-ly hot frappa-cappa-mocha-locha-double-venti-don’t-hold-the-whip-extra-ice-syrup-and sprinkles-on-top hipster-obnoxious coffee from Super ‘Spensive Caffeine Inc.,all over your brand new, of-the-moment, super-chic peplum-pantaloon-skinny jeans. On other days you wouldn’t take quite so much notice. Conversely, if you have something super-terrific happen to you on the 13th, you’re less likely to associate, say, finding a giant gummy bear on sale at a super-cheap bargain-bucket price in, like, your local New Look branch (seriously, stranger things have happened. We’ll get onto those in a minute, my superstitious sidekicks) with that damn, dratted day of the 13th.

•    For businesses this confirmation bias, eh, business can seemingly prove unlucky for them. Some estimates suggest that up to $900 million dolla-dolla bills go un-spent due to people’s intricate fear of the freaky 13th. Of course, this is only an estimate, and some people dispute it. Those people probably also dispute giant gummy bears too, so take no heed. Seriously though, there’s deffo a distinct proportion of people who place themselves firmly under-duvet for the day, so that certainly doesn’t do much for the business of greasy tills and the like. Which leads us on nicely to the next point…

Thirdly: Do you know what friggatriskaidekaphobia means? Or have the means to cure it?

How about paraskevidekatriaphobia? Could you hazard a guess, based on what this article is all about? Far too friggin’ lazy? Okay, let me put you out of your misery. Friggatriskaidekaphobia is a phobia of the most feared of Fridays, Friday the 13th. Paraskevidekatriaphobia is basically a synonym of same. Oh, and according to the great internets (per Dr. Donald Dossey at the Stress Management Center/Phobia Institute in Asheville, North Carolina) once you’re able to pronounce the latter, somehow you’re magically cured. Eh, God speed?!

Fourthly: Freaky Friday facts, some of which kiiind of lend a heavy helping hand to this whole fear of the number 13, and, of course, Friday the 13th

•    The majority of property purchases refuse to complete their sale on Friday the 13th, according to Richard Aldous, sales and marketing manager of Hopkins Homes.
•    On September 13th, 1996 rapper Tupac Shakur (2Pac) died.
•    Streets in the city of Florence, Italy, don’t even have houses numbered 13 —  instead those homes are addressed as 12 and a half (How very Harry Potter of them!).
•    Lots of public buildings skip (naming) the 13th floor by its creepy, rightful, numerical name altogether.
•    The number 13 is excluded entirely from the Italian national lottery.
•    Those Italians aren’t our only continental neighbours to have Triskaidekaphobia (a fear of the number 13) embedded in their culture. Nope, their French counterparts are afflicted with the same phobia –- in France there’s the phenomenon of the quatorziens (fourteeners), which are add-on party guests to guarantee that your party doesn’t host the dreaded total number 13 of guests. (Balder could have totally availed of this service)
•    Friday the 13th falls 3 times in 2012, but don’t worry, 2 of them are already behind you (like the boogeyman — don’t look now!).
•    Each of this years dreaded Friday the 13th have occurred exactly 13 weeks apart, how’s that for ooky-spooky, all you Friggatriskaidekaphobics?!

Tell me, are you still freaked out by Friday the 13th? Or firmly in the perturbed camp? Did you know where all the trepidation surrounding this most dreaded of days stemmed from? Do you believe in confirmation bias? Did my set of Friday the 13th and freaky number 13-related facts shock and surprise you (bonus points for both, obvs.)? Are you a confirmed friggatriskaidekaphobic, paraskevidekatriaphobic, or simply a confirmed bachelor (in which case –- call me!); or, do you brave out the freakiest Friday of all, albeit with galoshes, wellies, and kung-fu moves (basically a normal day’s shielding oneself from the raininess in Ireland, then)? Confess all in the comments, it’ll make your black soul lighter. Or tweet me your freaky Friday facts @aprilbarry101

This was originally published on July 13, 2012, and can be seen, in edited form, here.

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